Educating Korean wives-to-be in the traditions of the past

By Jacqueline Kim
Translation by Amanda Mao

On the surface, Seoul seems a hyper-modern metropolis that long ago traded its rich cultural inheritance for the modern trappings of the 21st century. However, remnants of the past sit tucked away inside this sprawling metropolis, as immovable as the artery-like network of Joseon-era (1392-1910) alleyways behind the face of each neon-illuminated commercial block. These deeply-anchored fixtures of days gone by remind visitors that while appearances may easily change, the fundamental cultural fabric of the city carries the weight of 1,000 years of historic tradition and cannot be easily discarded.

In the Junggu district of Seoul, marked only by a wooden board etched with three characters in hanja – traditional Chinese script – sits Yejiwon. Literally translating to the Institute of Etiquette and Wisdom, Yejiwon seeks to uphold the traditions of a time when a person’s decorum was a measure of his or her worth, a woman’s ability to abide by long-standing traditions was thought to reflect her virtue, and following long-established cultural norms was an indication of integrity. in 1974, Korean Broadcasting system (KBs) announcer Kang Young-sook founded Yejiwon to help improve the image of Korean tourism abroad. “at this time, foreigners thought of Korea as a place to enjoy gisaeng (courtesan-like female entertainers),” explains Kang. “i wanted to change this image of Korea in the eyes of foreigners.” she began by assembling Japanese cultural exchange programmes that taught traditional Korean tea etiquette and formal marriage customs. These programmes were so successful that Kang was asked to organise cultural exhibitions for the 10th asian Games and the 1988 seoul summer Olympics. since then, Yejiwon’s projects have decreased in scale, but the institute remains steadfastly committed to its mission of perpetuating traditional Korean culture, in a large part due to Kang’s belief in the importance of her work. “i have a very rewarding job; when i die i’m certain my ancestors will greet me with thanks for the work i did,” she says.

A bride-training course called gyusuban, one of Yejiwon’s most unique courses, aspires to transform gyusu – young unmarried ladies – into women who conduct themselves with attention to and mastery of the dictates of traditional Korean etiquette. The content of the course ranges from the traditional to the practical, with a heavy emphasis on yejeol – etiquette – and the explicit purpose of moulding virtuous, well-mannered future matrons. so what does one need to learn to become a properly trained bride? in the four-week intensive course, the girls learn the procedure of a traditional Korean wedding; how to choose appropriate hanbok – traditional Korean dress: yellow jeogori (jacket) and red skirt for young ladies, green jeogori and scarlet skirt for married women; and spend three full lessons learning cha yejeol – the method of serving tea according to Korean Buddhist traditions. some classes are run-of-the-mill sessions in motherhood prep and household management skills: lessons on pregnancy and labour, cooking and interior decoration.

The majority of the classes, however, focus on transmitting the traditional etiquette that has been at the heart of Korean society since its Confucianisation, which began with the Joseon Dynasty in the late 14th century – etiquette that emphasises the importance of women in domestic roles and perpetuates adherence to rules of filial piety, respect for elders and performing ancestral rites. These etiquette lessons inspire many future mothers-in-law to firmly encourage their daughters-in-law to enrol in the gyusuban. The course’s emphasis on etiquette ensures that a graduate will be properly educated in eoneoh yejeol – language etiquette – especially how to speak respectfully to one’s elders; and how to perform jeol (traditional bows) when performing jaesa (ancestor rituals), something Yejiwon graduates are widely known for doing with great propriety and grace.

While the gyusuban has a capacity of 40 students and is held only twice annually, enrolment suggests that contemporary interest in this type of education is waning, with only 15 students filling the seats in the current class. However, Kang asserts: “This type of class is even more important today. in the old days, people lived in large families all under one roof, and children learned our traditions naturally.” Currently enrolled gyusu also believe strongly in the value of their education and enthusiastically explain their motives for joining the course, which mostly revolve around the desire to prepare for motherhood.

“When a person gets married and has a baby, everything is a mess and it’s difficult to adjust to the demands of your new life. But if you learn and prepare in advance, then you can enjoy the pleasures of the experience of having a child. i’m taking this class to prepare for this,” explains one student. The gyusu, all in their mid to late twenties, applaud in agreement with this response.

Lee Hye-Jin, one of a growing number of Korean-born women who has spent a significant portion of her adult years abroad, explains that she’s on the course to learn more about the traditions of Korean culture. For those that share this interest in learning more about Korean culture, even if not a gyusu or preparing for marriage and motherhood, a visit to Yejiwon opens the door to a more intimate understanding of the traditional culture of this intriguing peninsula.